my new boyfriend. boo bear.

I was fortunate enough to visit a friend of mine who I met in Buenos Aires at TEFL teacher training. He lives in Vermont and his family kindly invited me to stay for a week while embracing some of the beautiful wonders of the area.

What made my stay more remarkable was that one member of the family, never knew that I was actually staying under the same roof. His name is Aiden, he’s 7 years old (due to be 8 on Christmas day), affectionately known as Boo Bear, and I evidently am his new girlfriend.

Boo Bear is such an interesting character. Hyperactive doesn't even cut it. In the mornings, as I stealthy lock myself in Kyle’s sister’s bedroom, I awaken to the sounds of a very loud child slamming doors and stomping through the hall. Hence, he is what in the modern world would be termed as “a special needs kid”. I seemingly have great taste in men.

Besides having great admiration for Boo Bears mother Nancy and his family who have resisted school teacher’s insinuations that he is a child that should be put on drugs or kicked out, I can’t help but feel that this is a story that many parent’s in this day and age are having to face.

He just doesn’t fit in the box.

Some say that trauma in early life, as in Boo Bear's time pre-adoption, can create challenges in development. This may be the case, however it can also be argued that there’s a box that hasn't evolved with the consciousness of the world around it.

This box being an educational paradigm saying that a child with special needs should be put on drugs, on therapy or socially excluded.

Don’t get me wrong, Boo Bear is certainly special. He craves a lot of attention and by being incredibly disruptive, creates stormy moments in the household and at school that require the family to delicately handle his need for control. Equally at school he has a ‘safe room’ and several teachers. Discipline is challenging for him because he wants to control every situation he’s in and when he feels he doesn't have that, things ‘get big’ which escalate and escalate to a point of self-destruction.

I am not a psychotherapist. A mere traveler am I seeing the world and all its shifts and madness, however, I hope that besides getting over me quickly enough once I go, I also hope Boo Bear finds his place in a world yet to evolve beyond medicating him and trying to force him in to a box.

The time we spent together among his toys (the 'softy party') renaming one “Booger Bear” and collaborating on a very eclectic salad will forever be treasured in my memory. Despite sometimes high-fiving my hand waaaay too hard, I mastered a trick to ensure the next girlfriend that comes along gets treated gracefully; "Darling, remember, I'm a flower".

Bless his heart... What a naughty little child he is. 

I want to share this alternative medication for certain special children as something to consider. I am not joking neither recommending beyond just something to think about.

For wild child reference (and laughs).