health is wealth.

 Auda, mi abuella (my grandmother) is a Venezuelan woman who grew up in a world of poverty. Her home was a concrete shack in the busy city of Barquisimeto. Her face tells the story of a hard life and yet her smile, a softness that’s transcended it all.

I went to hug abuella as my Aunty asked her “Remember who this is madre?”  trying to light a spark in my grandma’s now deteriorating memory. She has Alzheimer’s and diabetes, two conditions that don’t bode well together.

“Yessica” I whisper in her ear quietly hinting as she holds me with her little skinny arms.

She looked at me appreciatively holding my shoulders as she took a deep look in to my eyes. ‘Something familiar is there’ her eyes say.

“Yess-i-caaa” she said to me and smiled.

I hadn’t expected my travels to take me to Venezuela but given I have roots there and it is my mother’s old homeland, it was wonderful to reconnect and see my family.

My abuella’s condition was saddening and yet, there was a peace in her presence. She was living in the constant now. The past stories, the old stuff of my mother’s hard childhood and her addiction to buying shoes had dissolved. There was something quite beautiful in that.

I gave her some paints and a pad for her to paint with. She proceeded to simply paint hearts.

“What is the most important thing in the world abuella?” I asked my grandma wondering whether she had something profound to share with me, a message of sorts from the years she’d spent living what had not been a neasy life in such an unstable country.

“La salud” she replied.

Well-being.

I have enjoyed reading much on philosophy, psychology and the metaphoric stories of religious texts and Disney movies. I’ve found meaning in the lyrics to songs and deep truths inspired from meditations and asanas but my abuella told me something very true for us all.

Health is wealth.

The word wealth is rooted in the oldEnglish translation of the word ‘health’ and there’s a truism there if I ever I wanted one. The well-being of our minds, bodies and spirits is what makes life enjoyable for us, our friends, our family and our world.

Saludos.

honour time & happiness

Too often in life we find ourselves entangled in stuff, being drawn away from ourselves or getting stuck in a loop of behaviour patterns that disempower us.

Thanks to my old friend and 'gay husband' Faz Bags for this simple empowering exercise that he kindly shared with me.

It is such a great exercise for thinking about one's well-being and honouring the sacredness of time; a resource we all have a limited supply of and so in my humble opinion, must appreciate. "This too will pass" is a wonderful little reminder for that.

So...

Take out a sheet of paper, and a pen.

On the left side of the page, list all the ways you've been spending time on things that don't serve your goals of being happy, healthy and wise. For me I realised I spend a lot of time on social media which can distract me from the here and now. Thank God I don't use a smart phone.

On the right side, tell yourself how you will use that same time to your advantage, or how you can shift time around to make space for your goals. Even 5 minutes a day spent stressing less and healing more is extra healing you didn't have before. And when it comes to transformation, it all adds up!

Then, tape that sheet up on the fridge, and whenever you see it, remember to re-orient your day by using that brain of yours that's so good at getting what it wants to move your body into brand new habits that YOU want.

When I did this exercise in 2011 I came off Facebook, took up daily yoga practice, herbal tea and woke up every day with the mantra "carpe diem" trying one new thing every day. Spontaneously. This was my prescription in the wake of a break up and they were great new habits that I got to share with friends.

For people looking to get a step closer to their dharma, their purpose or calling(s) in life,
this exercise below is really empowering and simple to start brainstorming with to create a life you love.

Anyway I hope this helps.

Keep smiling - its good for you - as is being great.

why travel?

Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness. – Mark Twain

I've touched upon before the cool things I've learned travelling. I love always learning, having a beginner's mind and exploring new ideas and possibilities that not only grow me but also help create a better world.

What I've hardly touched upon is what I've unlearned and if there's one thing that explorative travel does for you, is teach you to expand your awareness, your ideas and perspectives on oneself and others. It teaches you to respect and care for others, despite them being different to you. This is invaluable in a world that is getting increasingly smaller through technology and industry.

As a girl who grew up in a small village in Warwickshire, England, I was fortunate to be surrounded by nature. I'd be playing in cow fields, making dens out of abandoned train tunnels, swimming in rivers and generally having a slow paced environment to grow up in. But I was also of a generation that watched a lot of TV, played computer games and studied very hard for fear of failure. Something that plagues teachers as well as their students. Hence, I had a whole world of ideas hot baked on to my being. Cultural programming one might call it and a lot of learned fears.

Despite leaving England 7 years ago, I've had chance to spend a lot of time in Britain this year (I still have lovely friends and family to see). It's been so good to come home to people I care for, especially my Dad, while also observe Britishisms and see how they've affected me and others around the country.

What a quirky bunch the Brits are!

Thankfully, Brits tend to be a very polite bunch and up for a laugh! I love this. I love the sense of humour, the banter and also the good manners. I love how we get together over tea. In fact one habit I have acquired travelling is to make myself a cup of Earl Grey whenever I am feeling homesick. I like how grounded this country is. Its organised and timely which is practical for me sometimes (and very necessary when working with others). I don't particularly dig the cost of living, extortionate train ticket prices, deeply entrenched ideas around class and the degree of alcoholism but I love this politeness and conscientiousness that is a tendency among Brits. And it is the most apologetic country I've ever been to.

As a country surrounded by water, Britain also has a sense of self-defensive reserve. Britain was once upon a time attacked at sea from all angles, our navy was world re-known and the cooler climates have created a hardiness among people. I think this is why the Brits can be somewhat reserved. It reminds me of the Japanese in a way, with the wall they build around themselves painted with tradition, reverence and honour.

You can tell when you get on a train. I laugh to myself at how contrasting a train carriage in England is with one in India for example. We're so proper in England and awkward around one another's space. In India, your hearing bhajans in the carriage next door, a man persistently pushing "chai chaiiiii chaiiii" and are likely to smell a whole world of Indian odours as you intimately share space with people, food and livestock.

But there's also an arrogance that comes with being British along with a pride and prejudice. We're a country of high standing in the world's history and were very good at manipulating the psyche's of countries we wished to conquer such as places I've visited; New Zealand, Australia and India (a failed attempt in Japan). I don't want to criticise as all cultures have 'their thing' and nor am I in denial of where I was born, but I can say, it has served me very well to spend time outside of England and explore the rest of the world. Eyes widen to fresh new paradigms, healthier ways of being and one's mind can take a big leap out of the fear mongering media that this country spins its wheels on creating an undertone of low level anxiety and fear of the unknown.

What travelling taught me to do was to look at the world from the stars. Somehow from there, there are no foreigners, no borders, no right and wrong, just life experiencing itself.

I really love an open-mind. A curiosity that welcomes the new despite challenging the status quo or what is believed to be known. I love having my perspective challenged or illuminated by that of another. That is why I travel, because I keep learning new things, meeting interesting people, seeing different perspectives and having life experiences that keep me moving. Not always easy I might add.

My next adventure takes me to the Alps where I will be managing some chalets in Reberty, a small French village in the Three Valleys. A far cry from my old desk job. But I am so excited about this trip! It was on the bucket list to do a ski season. I'm delighted to be also offering therapies and running a yoga retreat in the mountains while sharing the incredible practices I've learned these last few years to people in resort.

I invite anyone reading this not to get too stuck in your ways, to allow new ideas to come forth and to keep that dream alive!!! You may have to defend it, you may have to face some fears and you may have to patiently wait or learn a thing of two. You may have to change things. But my God does it create a life worth living and to be incredibly thankful for.

That's why I travel. Because it reminds me to keep loving life and believing.

give me truth.

Rather than love, than money, than fame, give me truth. - Henry David Thoreau

I've been doing a lot of reflecting recently. An awful lot. And I've been going deep in to myself and finding the points in my being that still get affected by the behaviours of others. Given that I spent a good year or so in a wonderment of being in India and Nepal working on inner peace (these are great places for practice because anything can happen and one learns to patiently wait for the train to arrive at the station 5 hours after it was due in a state of surrender), I had hoped I'd be more masterful at it

What I recognised about relating to others, most importantly, is how much of a good relationship boils down to trust. Now granted, people change and things do happen in life so commitments might be made which can't be adhered to. But where my integrity (or 'my code') has been poked at over and over is when I've felt cheated of truth.

The first time this happened to me traveling was in India and I was so upset. "It's his karma" the man at the crystal store said to me after he revealed to me the fact that the stone around my neck I'd bought earlier that day was actually a fake. I was determined to march back up to the mountain where I bought it from and tell that boy what for! But crystal man told me to let it go and I eventually did.

As a traveler, I trust the world. I believe in humanity and human beings can be just absolutely awesome. The other day I was on a bus from Salzburg to the airport without a ticket. I was whacked after waking up in the small hours of darkness and didn't find the time nor energy to buy a ticket believing I could get one on the bus. Evidently not but I sat down nevertheless. When the ticket inspector came, I felt like an awkward foreigner with the bus carriage watching me wriggle out of the situation - honestly might I add - with my hands up in "I'm sorry, I didn't get one". Before I had chance to blush, I was totally bowled over by this kindly gentleman next to me who placed a bus ticket in my hand and proceeded to merely smile and shake his head when I handed him a 5 euro note.

Now recently, forgive my self-indulgence, but I've felt really let down by a couple of situations. Being a natural optimist and I absolutely look back and think "thank God for that" accepting that I attracted them in to my world to learn something "lesson or a blessing" as the yogis say. Nevertheless I've dug deep in to my psyche to work out what has been the pain point in this.

It boiled down to one thing: dishonesty. I feel fortunate that I am aware enough to feel when I am being manipulated or seduced and to also have a good degree of understanding and compassion. I'm sure, no doubt, that I am guilty of it too - getting too attached to an outcome and trying to make it happen rather than to allowing it to flow.

But disappointment is one hell of a teacher. And perhaps this is a root of not just my own disappointment but also that of many others living in this world. Unless you live in an ashram or a community - we are all part of this capitalist society whether we like it or not. And consciously or unconsciously - we get told things that aren't necessarily objective truth. I remember seeing a sign saying "Time is money" in New York last year and smelt that smell again.

I, being the meditator I am, try to practice creating space around these stalks to gently dig around them, like a gardener does a tree root in order to get it out. And this operation can hurt a lot because it requires me to sit with the feeling and try not direct negativity at the person who's brought it about (and I struggle with it because I'm the one I am really annoyed with so Jess gets a hard time). This sensation if it had a voice would say something like "how dare you!" in self-righteous indignation which only serves to create more separation between me and the button pusher. The same kind of separation that creates war between beliefs / religions :(

But this is what it comes down to. Trust. Whether you admire / believe in another person's integrity i.e. it aligns with your own, or whether you resonate with truth and thus have an innate ability to sniff out bull-shit like you've already stepped in it, this is what can powerfully unite us. Truth.

I wish I could say I've been perfect but I've made mistakes, been in denial, afraid to speak my truth (or been too truthful and created a wee bit of trouble), I've responded harshly and in the early years been foolishly misguided by others.

It's such a simple little word and yet so important; Truth. What I do know is that there is one person I can wholeheartedly trust and that is myself. In my experience, the most empowering lesson is to be true and working towards feeling absolutely comfortably with it.

With fearlessly speaking it, thinking it, walking it and living it.

And in the modern world we live in today - where we are often surrounded by hooks and fears - this can take some practice and humility to step out of.

But as a wise Baba I hung out with in India said to me: "Don't get stuck" and "Keep going" - head wiggle, head wiggle. There's something incredibly enlightening about that approach.

Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. - Dr. Seuss